Posted by: newq | August 6, 2011

Life and how to live it part XIV

For Christmas I asked and received a USB powered clock/pen holder/ fish tank.  After 3 months I finally got it set up but Kristin was very convinced that it was animal cruelty not to condition the water so rather than take the bottle from the house I decided to order Sea Monkeys!  Yea!  (Sorry for the commercial, such is the current state of the ‘net  http://www.mtv.com/videos/misc/408064/sea-monkeys.jhtml)

Now all was well but not many spawned.  I went to PAX East and had co-worker Harvery care for them. (PAX East was awesome, I was promoted to Deputy Enforcer (which means I showed up on the org chart, impressive when there are 500 volunteers and 35 on the chart) for the show, but Wil Wheaton wasn’t there to snub so you don’t need me to tell you things you can look up on the web.) Any way back to the point, Harvey  did a fine job.  He said he saw as many as 3 which was as many as I ever saw.  But within a few weeks their appearances became fewer and fewer.  I did nothing different but on a Monday morning I saw one http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h81Ojd3d2rY and on Tuesday http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPLWBhNW3FM I walked in to turn on the aerator for 15 seconds (all they need) to see it kick up a carcass of the last monkey.  We all know the scene of the dancing plastic bag in American Beauty so I won’t even bother to link it, but it was like that… except with a husk.  TRAUMA!

I also took a spin around the world of Lego Star Wars sets.  I bought Slave I which I had bought several years before, this was the latest iteration.  Let me say this about that…. B.S.!  The new one is too to the point.  Remember when Lego showed you the model but the back had the pictures of the other cool things you could make?  No more.  There are pieces to a ’87 Taurus in this thing.  Pieces you could never find even on the web and that were obvious custom molds for this ship.  I’m not talking the cool custom mini-figs, eff-in’ “regular” blocks!

I had my 34th birthday.  I worked the day but took Friday July 1 off to make a 4 day weekend.  It started off odd as my spam inbox was filled with “funeral preparation” emails.  I celebrated at the bar and remember half of it.  Kristin drove me home but on Friday morning we played the “What do you remember game”?  Now I remember not paying for a G-D thing except for one beer when a special guest star appeared and I made it a point to pay.  Other than that I recall the bartender asking “Who’s buying this one?” At which point I walked to the far end and started asking who was buying?  It took me to the first person.  It helped that I knew everyone sitting at the bar proper.  Person 2 and 3 offered rounds I knew I could not accept.  Buy 500 in a year; get 5 free, that’s the benefit of being a regular.

But my favorite was when she said, “Do you remember the big skin-head with all the piercings putting you in a headlock?  I don’t know what you did but he was pissed and I was scared.”

“Oh that!  Yes I remember now… that was Craig, he’s a Steelers fan and I haven’t seen him since Superbowl.  I’ve know him for years.   That was all good.”  She was glad that he hadn’t pummeled me but she took comfort in the fact that no one else in the bar seemed to mind.

Oh, and I know it’s August but Christmas in July is still on my mind http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gN4HtiSzBY4

I think the final news is that Kristin got chickens.  Let me say that again… KRISTIN got chickens.  There was an agreement made. I have to admit that since I don’t have to care for them they are interesting on the level I’m interested in them.  That said she has one http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wyandotte_%28chicken%29 , two Rhode Island Reds, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhode_Island_Red_Chicken , and “I say I say Boy”  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foghorn_Leghorn a Leghorn. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leghorn_%28chicken%29   One of the reds looks chronically stoned. (pun intended) Seriously, this thing gets sleepy looking at concrete, air, other chickens, anything.  We don’t know what it does during the day but it’s into something the others aren’t.  Kristin and gay farm boy now landlord Matt were in the same psych program and have determined it to be a “FAS” chicken.  (Fetal Alcohol Syndrome)  I got permission; it’s still okay to call an animal a ‘tard.

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